Journal: Six things I did, but I didn’t want to do

Another journal writing exercise. Today, it’s a list of things, a la The Pillow Book.  

1. I slapped you because I thought you said something you didn’t because I am paranoid I may be going deaf.

2. I had to read your death sentence twice in court because I burped when announcing the verdict.

3. I cried at your funeral even though I hate you because your death saddened people I love.

4. I killed something I love because I didn’t want you to have it.

5. I wished for our son’s death because your wish reanimated his corpse.

6. I had to destroy the world because I stayed up late last night and was touched by God.